Recently, I have been accused of overusing the word "crap." It's true. I use the word "crap" in conversation almost as much as the dentist uses toothpaste. I first learned the word in 1985, when I was in Kindergarten. My best friend at the time, a kid named Ricky, used it one day when he stepped in a mud puddle. I didn't know what it meant at the time, but I too stomped in the mud puddle and let the pseudo-expletive fly. Since then it has been a signature part of my vocabulary. I can proudly say that I have never had a cussing problem, but I readily admit that I have a crapping problem...wait a second...I mean...well, you get the idea.
Here are some reasons why I like the word crap:
1. Its wide grammatical range.
2. The sweet cacophony of it.
3. Its shock value in polite company.
4. Its wuss value in impolite company.
5. Its ability to make you feel PG-13 when you're really only PG.
6. It rhymes with trap and wrap.
7. The short "A" sound.
8. It's the only thing I've ever learned from a kid named Ricky.
9. It's like "cap" with an "r."
10. Some Kindergarteners pronounce it like "cwap."